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Just a small short story I wrote.

Discussion in 'Creation Station' started by Cid, Feb 22, 2013.

  1. This is an odd dream I had last night, and I thought I would share it with you guys. I thought it would make for a perfect short story, albeit an odd one. Feedback would be appreciated, even though I already know what will be said. omgitsucks



    Its a nice clear day, in the afternoon. Around 5, maybe 6 O'Clock. Its fairly sunny out, and there are many beams of light poking out from the treetops. I feel content with the day, and I am not really sure why I was drawn toward this forest.... Its like I just felt something was there, something would be there for me. As if something has just been missing, and I am searching for it blindly. I couldn't remember who I was, or why I was here. All I could remember was my purpose... to make it back to were I belong.

    The trees are very long and tall, not many branches except for near the top. The forest is almost a bit magical, maybe mythical would be a better word. There are many trees. The leaves of the trees were of an odd purple colour, with the bark being a nice brown, with a small green tint to it. It was a bit of an odd colour for the trees to be, yet that fact is exactly what compelled me to continue on my journey through these woods. Looking ahead, I thought I could see the terrain changing.

    The terrain seems to be changing into a bit of a path, winding around the many trees that are in the forest. It is seemingly trying to avoid the beams of light that traveled down, almost as if it could spring to life and dodge it. It leads deep into the forest, and I see an object on the path. Upon examining the object, it seems to be an old drinking container made of an old gritty wood. It has a locked top on it, and it makes me think... Is there more to this? I pocket the container, and continue along the path.

    One of the many trees that dot the forest seems to have fallen. It is one of the larger, yet older ones, hollowed out at the ends, almost enough that one could crawl through it. The old greenish wood on it has rotted down a bit, and has turned into more of a blackish-green. I proceeded to climb over the tree, and continue on my way through this forest.

    After getting over the fallen tree, I spotted a peculiar key hanging on a small lone branch out in the woods. I walk over to it, and see that it is quite old, and ornate. I decide to take it, and upon grabbing it, a small memory returns to my head, of a story my father had told me. "And when the key is foun... nlock the containe.... er will be yo...." It was fairly foggy, and hard to hear. It reminded him of the container he had picked up not 20 minutes ago though. Perhaps the key goes to this...?

    However, before the thought could even be finished, a hissing could be heard just in front of me. I notice a small snake just ahead of me, lifting its head of tall in the small bit of sunlight nearby. It is quite odd in its colour, as with the rest of the forest. It has bright red scales, which seem to be shimmering in the sun like small red gems. It hissed a bit more, warning me not to go any closer to it, and I happily obeyed. I did not exactly want to deal with what may or may not be a deadly snake right now. I backed away, and continued back down the path which I had been following.

    Continuing down the path, I come to a little cross-roads. One path heads into a fenced off dwelling., while the other continues deeper into the forest. Before I even think about checking around the area though, I go back to my thought from earlier. I pull the key and the small wooden container out of my pocket again, and look at them. The key seems just the right size for the container, so I decide to try opening it. Upon putting the key in the hole on the container, some multi-coloured light pours out of the small hole, while the lid on the top opens up.

    Inside, a small glowing orb can be seen, shimmering almost every colour of the rainbow. The orb starts to glow brighter, and I quickly close up the container again, confused. Almost scared as to what it could be. What... What was that?... It seemed powerful... yet tranquil. Maybe I should hold onto this until later... who knows where else this path will lead me anyway? He then locked up the container, and put it back in his pocket with the key. Still unable to get the thought of the orb out of my head, I looked over towards the dwelling.

    The fence surrounding the dwelling is quite tall, and is surrounded with hedges the same colour as the leaves from the trees around him.. At the top of the fence, it is quite pointy, and is obviously meant to keep someone, or something out. I decide to try the gate, but not to anyones surprise, it was locked. I looked around for some other way to get through, and I saw a loose railing near the corner of the fence. It seemed loose enough to pull aside, and slip through... So I did so, wanting to see what was beyond the fence.

    After getting beyond the fence, I was able to examine the house in greater detail. It was a very old, wooden house, which towered quite high into the sky. It wasn't exactly tall enough to really be called a "Tower" or big enough to be called a "Manor", yet it was still quite an impressive house. I decided I would enter the house, as it looked as if it was abandoned. If it wasn't it really needed to be taken care of better.

    Upon entering the house, it was like walking into an old library. There were several old books stacked as high as the ceiling, and there were a couple of chairs by a fire place. The fire place seemed recently lit, and was still smoldering hot with its brightly lit flame. On my left was an entrance to another room, which had many noises which resembled that of regular house-hold cooking. The smell of cooking meat could be smelled coming from that room, but I thought it would be better if I didn't look inside. I mean, I'm probably not even welcome here anyway. I decided I had more than over-stayed my welcome, and left the house to continue deeper into the forest.

    Upon leaving, this time I just unlocked the gate, and walked through it to get back onto the path. I felt as if I should continue along it, as if something from ahead was drawing me near. It was the same feeling I had before... yet it was stronger now. I continued along the path, and a small creature hopped out of the near-by trees. It resembled something of a rabbit, yet it was shimmering an odd green. It was like the snake from before, only as if each of its little strands of fur were made of tiny emeralds. I had never seen such odd animals before... I continue to observe it, until it notices me. The rabbit-like creature hops towards me. It looks at me odd, as if I am out of place here in this forest, not meant to ever have been here. Then, it hops away, as if it had never met me. It was an odd encounter, just as many other things were odd on this small journey I had gone on so far. I decided to just shake it off, and continue back along the path.

    As I continued back along the path, I could feel something in me. Almost as if I was almost at the area I had been feeling, the one that I was compelled to go toward. I noticed a stream I had not seen before, just trickling along-side the path, after curving in from deeper in the woods. It was of a dark-purple colour, as if it was toxic. I put my finger into the water, and take a taste of it to see what it was like. It tasted unlike anything I had ever tasted before... yet it was not a bad taste. I looked up ahead, and I saw light pouring out from the trees. I felt so compelled to go toward this light, yet I was so fearful of it as well. Is this it...? I thought. Is this the area I have been compelled to search for? I walk into the light, and was surprised at what I saw.

    Upon entering the light, I stumbled a bit at what I saw. I had nearly fell off of what I saw. I was right on the edge of a cliff, over looking a large grotto, filled with several of the odd coloured animals, each one glowing as bright as the next. There were birds whose feathers seemed to be made of small topaz, and a couple of deer drinking some of the purple water. There fur was of an odd blue colour, sort of like that of sapphire. Every animal here seemed to be made of some sort of gem, and at the back, I saw a large animal resembling a lion. It was was glowing a bright orange, except for its mane. Its mane was glowing almost every colour of the rainbow, all pulsing along.

    I looked down from the cliff, and saw a water fall pouring down into a small pond, where the stream was going over the cliff. I felt the container in my pocket start to shake a bit, and I pulled it out. It was as if the orb in it was trying to escape from the container. I decided to unlock it, and the lid flew open as the orb shot out into the sky. All of rainbow-coloured animals looked over at it, floating there in the sky. It was ominous, lighting up the grotto even more than it was already, with a nearly blinding light. It seemed to be growing... as did everything else around me. It was a beautiful sight... It almost caused my primal instincts from deep inside to shoot out, and unleash upon the world. I looked down, and realized where I am.

    I was at the place my father had described to me long ago, the place were mans primal instincts shot out, and released themselves as a bright, shining form. A burst of light shot out of me, and my body layed there, on top of the cliff, motionless. The light that jumped out of me formed into a small lion cub, and I was finally back to my home. My true home.

    Yes, I know. Like I said, It was a very odd dream, and this is almost exactly what happened. Feel free to comment on it.
     
  2. There were a few spelling/grammatical errors here or there ("mans primal instincts" should be "man's primal instincts" or "men's primal instincts"), but that's far from the actual point - and that is to provide some feedback on the actual story. Do you know what, Cid? I liked it. I want to read more, and see where it goes from here. I'm always a sucker for a solid first-person narrative, and this seems to fit the bill. Very interested in this heavy fantasy/sci-fi fusion you have going on here and I'm definitely intrigued by this unique animals. I'm glad I was the first to respond to this, even if it has been quite a few months since this topic came to fruition and this should be getting more attention than it has, because I really do enjoy your work and I hope you continue on with this.
     

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