ZEJstuck (No Reply)

====> Be the youngest child.

Your name is Gold and man, are you excited! They’re finally here! You first heard about these games a month ago from a friend, kinda like a brother to you, and you’ve been hyped since! You just got your disks, but you don’t really know an awful lot about the game…Oh! ​

A friend of yours is trying to reach you on ZEJspammer!​

 

====> Be the friend who, while knowing just as little, must be introduced.​

Spoiler: show spamlog

-- codasterousDisaster [CD] began spamming goldDullahan [GD] at 6:45 --​

CD: Hey sis​

GD: You rang?​

CD: Did you get the disks yet?​

GD: Yeah but I have no idea what they’re even for. Do you?​

CD: ...I think it’s best to ask the one who sent you them.​

GD: I guess, but who to ask? Who told you about yours?​

CD: Some kid. He thinks he can out-chem me, ha! I guess you should get info on your disks first though. Later​

-- codasterousDisaster [CD] ceased spamming goldDullahan [GD] at 6:45 --​

Man. You like to go by the name of Cody, and Sir Cody says these betas are a pain in the ass. You don’t mind playing a good game- especially since it’s with your friends- but this whole thing is taking too long. You’re not even allowed to play yet! Something about having to wait until sis gets in, according to some smartass, being her “server” or something.​

Looks like said smartass is currently trying to contact you.​

You guess it’s not that big a deal. Sure, you argue, but it’s all in good fun. You huff as you click on your chat window, trying to seem bothered. Not that anyone can see you. (If only you knew)​

Spoiler: show threadlog

-- espyZygardius [EZ] began threading codasterousDisaster [CD] at 6:47 --​

EZ: Done talking to your friend?​

CD: Yeah, yeah. Who's in charge of her, biochem douche.​

EZ: Excuse the everloving chemistry out of you! That’s no way to talk to your chem alpha, scrub.​

CD: “Scrub.” Wow. I'd say you spit fire but it burns more like H2SO4. Just answer the question.​

EZ: I’ll let disrespect slide this once. She’s with a Ms. debatingQueen, AKA DQ.​

CD: Well tell this DQ to hurry up and tell Gold about her betas.​

EZ: She’s doing it as we speak.​

EZ: I just want to warn you, she’s going to be the first to enter.​

CD: Sis?​

EZ: Yeah, “sis”. The entry is going to be risky for all of you, but you're going to have to witness hers and- Well just don’t freak out. Stay calm for the both of you.​

CD: Hey what do you mean?​

-- espyZygardius [EZ] ceased threading codasterousDisaster [CD] at 6:50 --​

CD: ...Prick.​

You close the chat with yet another huff. Stupid biochem-major who thinks he’s cooler than you... He doesn’t even tell you anything about the game! All he ever says is “You have to wait.” or “You’ll be her server.” or some other unimportant fact.​

Gets on a guy’s nerves.​

And what does he mean “stay cool”? You are the boss at staying cool. No one’s cooler than Cody, you're practically LN2.​

You begin to laugh for a good minute or two at your own joke. What a nerd.​

 

====> Be the one who’s about to finally learn.

Spoiler: show spamlog

-- debatingQueen [DQ] began spamming goldDullahan [GD] at 6:45 --
DQ: Hey!
GD: I guess you’ll tell me about the game?
DQ: Darn. Guess someone spoiled that surprise. Well step one, pop in that first disk.
GD: With the house?
DQ: Yep! Just let that download while we talk.
GD: Can I click it when it’s done?
DQ: You’ll have to wait for your server to get set up too, until then we can hold a mini lesson!
GD: Well first things first, what’s this even called? And why are we playing?
DQ: Well it’s called ZEJ, ha- like our chat clients, I know. And you’re playing because... Well that’s debatable.
GD: And you are the “debatingQueen”.
DQ: I suppose it’s up to everyone to figure that out together, I doubt even I- the grand queen of debate- could decide it alone. Although I could make a very convincing argument!
DQ: But it doesn’t matter much- you’re kind of obligated to play.
GD: ?
DQ: Nevermind that. Let’s get you prepped. Now like most games, you’ll need a main weapon-type to equip!
GD: I can’t really fight, but... Well I guess I can find something.

For whatever reason, the word strife-specibus pops into your head. The hell is that?​

You look around your room for anything even mildly threatening. Let’s see: A coat hanger, a boot, some paper…​

Oh- an umbrella! You pick it up and pretend you’ve equipped it like some nifty game character.​

Spoiler: show spamlog

GD: Alright, I’ve found something!

 

====> Be a fabulous queen, somewhere far off on a distant world…

Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be anyone like that. So instead you get to be a fabulous student, somewhere in Virginia.​

Your name is Brittany (though your friends call you Rose)and you are very bothered. Usually this view port works just fine and you get to see whoever you’re talking to- But not this “Gold” character! You’ve been tinkering with the application since the start of this conversation and it just won’t work, all you can see is a black screen.​

Looks like you’ll have to figure out what she’s got the old fashioned way.​

Spoiler: show spamlog

DQ: Excellent! What’d you pick?
GD: I uh... an umbrella.
DQ: Oh don’t worry, I’m sure you can make use of it... yeah.
DQ: Now... well now you need something dead.
GD: What.
DQ: Prototyping. It’s- you know what, just do it. I’ll explain after you’ve chosen.

 

====> Be LN2.

You unfortunately cannot be liquid nitrogen because it’s busy being a cool motherfucker. You can, however be something equally cool. That is to say-​

You are now Cody.​

And man, is Cody happy. Mr. Biochem is actually helping you out now, apparently because sis is getting set up for the game too.​

Spoiler: show threadlog

EZ: Alright... So you’ve gotten your weapon.
CD: If you mean my “pimpin” chemistry set, then yes.
EZ: Yeah, yeah. Just listen to me- You need to know about the different deployables.
CD: Deployables...?
EZ: Deployables, n. obviously something that can be fucking deployed.
CD: Alright sheesh. Take it easy.
EZ: How can I take it easy when you’re acting like you don’t understand the world deployable?
CD: Clearly the question wasn’t “What is a deployable?” but “What are the specific deployables?”
EZ: Well if you’d shut up I might be able to grace your eyes with a beautifully typed answer.
CD: Oh man, I’m practically salivating in expectation.
EZ: I feel like you’re not taking this seriously, scrub. Are you taking this seriously?

It’s just a game, sheesh. (You’d regret that later)​

You decide to humor him anyways.​

Spoiler: show threadlog

CD: Very seriously.
EZ: Would you say... hella seriously?
CD: Hecka hella.
EZ: ... I’m excusing that shit response, but only because if you don’t listen to me you might endanger a little girl.
CD: She’s not that little. I mean, it’s not like she’s a baby. Show some respect, she can probably crush you with a single fist.

Somewhere out there, a teen girl suddenly feels as though she’s drastically failing to meet someone’s expectations. She glances to her brother’s dumbbell on the floor, then to the chips on the table. Chips it is, then.

Spoiler: show threadlog

EZ: That’s all well and good but that won’t solve much unless you can get her set up.
CD: I know, I know! God, just start talking before I punch you in the gut or something.
EZ: We all know your about as strong as  Mg3Si4O10(OH)2. Obviously I’d win.
CD: *Gasp* I just came out to have a good time and I honestly feel so attacked right now
EZ: ... Right, so that totem lathe huh. Why don’t we talk about that.

 

====> Gold: Be astounded at the lack of dead things in the vicinity.

I-it’s not like you expected to find dead things, baka! Who keeps random dead things in a small apartment anyways? Oh wait nevermind, you found a dead thing. ​

Should this be considered a good thing, or...?​

You shrug and return to your laptop. All the better to prototype it with, my dear.​

Man, you have to stop doing references and memes all the time. What a dork.​

Spoiler: show spamlog

GD: Would a dead mouse be enough?
DQ: Definitely enough to prototype with, yes.
GD: So how do I prototype this thing?
DQ: It all starts with this shiny little thing called a Kernelsprite. You’ll get one when you start the game.
DQ: Of course, first you’ll have to open up your cruxtuder.
GD: How does that work?
DQ: Your server just has to deploy the thing and then drop something heavy on it.
GD: And then I prototype?
DQ: Yup. Just throw that sucker in there and you’re good!
GD: So what’ll this whole thing do?
DQ: Well your sprite will guide you along on your quest. The prototyping also ends up affecting our enemies a bit, if I’m understanding right.
GD: So I guess a mouse is pretty good for us, since mice aren’t too strong.
DQ: Exactly! Anyways, once you get the cruxite dowel that is also released, you’ll put it in a totem lathe. Your server will give you a pre-punched card to put into a slot, put it in and you’ll get a neat carving done to your dowel.
DQ: The pattern is used to signify it’s for a specific object. Next, you put that on an alchemiter.
GD: Right.
DQ: Which will create an object. You’ll have to destroy that to enter. Everyone’s is different so you’re a bit on your own.

 

====> Cody: Get this party started​

Espy has essentially given up trying to explain to you and has instead sent you a file. It’s actually pretty cool. Some sort of guide to the game that was written by someone else.​

The guide calls the game SBURB, though. Foreign name? Working title? Whatever.​

Apparently the real guide is bigger, but Espy and his friends have only been able to actually find this small bit. How does that even work? If there’s more they could have just read it the whole way through- what’s so special about this that only a part of it has gotten into their hands?​

They’re probably messing with you.​

You pop in the server disk- gotta make a client and server connection with sis- and wait. Soon, you see a client reaching you and make a connection. You’ve heard that you’ll get to see her and that’s pretty damn exciting.​

Sis is a bit uncertain about posting pictures online (both because she’s young and also because she’s highly self-conscious) and you’ve only ever heard her voice. But now, Sir Cody’s day has come.​

Spoiler: ZEJ: Open

​

 

====> Gold: Be revealed

Spoiler: Gold Reveal

You remain blissfully seated at your computer, typing away. Brittany, you’ve learned this to be DQ’s name, during her wonderful explanation mentioned that the server will see you. In your infinite genius, you threw on tinted goggles and a scarf-thing to cover your mouth.​

 

====> Cody: She’s so...

Spoiler: So...

You tell her as much.​

Spoiler: Show spamlog

-- codasterousDisaster [CD] began spamming goldDullahan [GD] at 7:03 --
CD: You are adorable.
GD: What
CD: Look at you, clacking away at your laptop all cutely.
CD: Fucking kawaii
GD: I
GD: Yes.
GD: Can you see my screen?
CD: No, why?

 

====> Gold: Be smooth, kid, no panicking- be chill!

You discreetly close that Google Image search of Diana Agron. Bullet dodged, dignity preserved.​

You sigh, but because you have shit luck Cody decides to deploy the cruxtruder by your bed that very moment. You cough and begin to choke on your spit.​

Fuck- Bullet not dodged. You’ve jumped into the line of fire. What is dignity? You’ve never heard of the word.​

You collapse onto your blanket and take deep breaths from your nose.​

This is totally not normal, you swear. You don’t always just randomly act uncool. (But you do.)​

 

====> Gold: Examine deployables.

Cody has efficiently deployed everything around your house. The cruxtruder, as mentioned, is beside your bed. The totem lathe is in your room, pressed against one of the walls. The alchemiter is just a short walk away in your medium sized apartment- it’s in the empty area of your kitchen, by the window.​

He drops the pre-punched card on your bed right beside you.​

Spoiler: Show spamlog

CD: Thumbs up.

You physically return the gesture before grasping the pre-punched card and walking to the cruxtruder. You’ll need your first cruxite dowel from here- but the opening of this not only releases your kernelsprite, but also begins the countdown for some total devastation via meteor.​

You wave to Cody. He drops your bookbag onto the cruxtruder. It’s begun. You were confused at first, when Brittany said you had to play the game. But you’ve heard her explanation. You really do have to. You were destined to enter this shitstorm. You always knew your destiny would be fucking terrible.​

Spoiler: Gold Kernel, Gold Timer

 

====> Gold: Prototype this bitch

You glance at the mouse on the floor. You’re gonna prototype that bitch so hard. (Damn, why does that have to sound so suggestive?)​

Spoiler: Gold Prototype

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RR2ihNZWfZE[/video]

​

 

====> Gold: Witness Mousesprite be revealed

Spoiler: Mousey Reveal

​

She’s so precious. So adorable. She’s- dare you say it- kawaii.​

You’ve decided to name her Reginald.​

But hold up? Why does dear, sweet Reginald have the ghost tail? From what you’ve heard, that’s only after the second prototyping.​

Spoiler: Show spritelog

GD: Why the ghost tail?
Reginaldsprite: Ah, you must be wondering about that! Well I am the second thing to be prototyped.
GD: Really? What the heck was the first!?
Reginaldsprite: I happened to have a piece of flaming hot cheetos in my stomach.
GD: That counted as a prototyping? You’re kidding. Why?
Reginaldsprite: Because it’s ZEJ, that’s why!
Reginaldsprite: How hurry up and get your artifact, the timer’s counting down!
GD: Right shit, sorry Reginald!

 

====> Gold: Deploy the card, be the alchemizer

You hurry to put the pre-punched card into the totem lathe and put your pretty golden dowel into it’s slot. You start the lathe and watch as your dowel is quickly carved. You rush to the kitchen to place it onto your alchemiter.​

You wait.​

And then it’s there. A large mirror- golden frame, red glass. You can see yourself in it.​

Not the you presently, the you that has her face hidden.​

You can see your face unobstructed- it’s as if you can see your face from each year of your life, all at once. Your void, dark brown eyes stare back at you. You hate them. The pupil and the colored part are too close in shade. Sometimes you can’t tell them apart- your eyes appearing like one solid, lifeless orb in the midst of white.​

The mirror zooms past you into your room, glass pointed at you. It’s taunting you.​

 

====> Reginaldsprite: Observe Gold, toss her the green umbrella when needed.

You give Reginald a quick glance. You see a slight nod from her and you nod in return.​

You charge forth to catch the mirror- Who gives a shit about seven years of bad luck?​

Spoiler: Gold Enter

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpcH6OnLa5g&feature=youtu.be[/video]

​

 

====> Gold: Exit your apartment.

To your surprise, the door of your apartment does not lead to the building corridor- instead it leads outside. You wander a bit of a distance away from your house before stopping.​

Spoiler: LOLAD

​

The ground before you goes from color to color with no transition. Whereas the nearer bits of land are incredibly dark, the area you can see further ahead is quite bright. The sky of whatever this place is contrasts with the ground- a pure white. Somehow it doesn’t hurt your eyes.​

Must be the goggles.​

There’s also specks of gold floating around- for some reason only in the area ahead of you, the sky behind you is totally clear. Closer to the ground they seem to huddle together- a large, thick line of gold on the horizon. Some sort of gray building resides just in front of the huddle of gold. Well, it might be right in front of it- you can’t tell from this distance.​

Hold on, some weird shit is walking towards you.​

Spoiler: Reginimp approaches

​

Ugh- it’s probably those imp things you have to fight. It looks like some sort of un-cute version of Reginald- OK WOW- It also apparently has fire powers!? ​

Fucking flaming hot cheetos prototyping! This is such bullshit!​

 

====> Cody: Be threaded by someone you’re not entirely familiar with.​

You’re so engrossed in the beauty of sis’ Land that you almost miss the little beep as you get a message on ZEJspammer.​

Spoiler: Cody's ZEJspammer

​

You don’t recognize the name immediately, more confused as to why the user is in your Spamroll rather than there being a pop-up about a new user trying to contact you. Then of course you finally figure out that it’s the girl who was explaining the game to Gold. You decide to ignore the weird auto-Spamroll thing that just happened.​

Spoiler: Show threadlog

-- debatingQueen [DQ] began threading codasterousDisaster [CD] at 7:12 --
DQ: Sup codrizzle my brizzle
CD: What
DQ: Sorry, Gold asked me to say that when I contacted you
DQ: So. She’s in, huh.
CD: Yeah, I guess we got it done.
DQ: And you’re next.
CD: Really!?
DQ: Well her second portal
DQ: No wait, gate, my bad. It’s called a gate. I think. You know what? Nevermind what it’s called.
DQ: Her second one takes her to her server’s house. But you need to be inside the medium for that to happen.
CD: So I guess Espy’s going to act as my server while I get in?
DQ: Um. Actually it’s me.
DQ: That’s why I’m contacting you.
CD: He... Isn’t...?
CD: I mean I should’ve guessed, since he’s not the one contacting me.
CD: Not that I mind you being my server!
DQ: Right then. Only been a few minutes or something since Gold’s entry and we’re already on our way for entry 2.
CD: Guess we’re on a roll here.
DQ: I guess we are! This is pretty good progress, I feel.
CD: So it’s go time?
DQ: Mission is a go!

 

====> Recap that includes the new scene- Britt + Cod Connect. Now with music!

Spoiler: Due to circumstances, it's a dropbox file

https://www.dropbox.com/s/jeekjhi0x0cq5qa/1.wmv?dl=0

Spoiler: Music credits and the best frame from the whole thing

(Don't expect music from me from now on, too lazy for that lol)
Blood Theme by Cazette