I'm going out to buy a couple bags of milk...

A befittingly Canadian thread title... but I feel like an absentee father more than ever, now.

After the events of the past couple days, I've decided that I need some time and space for myself. I've said my piece, and there's no need to extend the drama further. I just want this thread to be an acknowledgement to those not privy to the discussion I had with the staff.

I'll be taking a hiatus. I don't know how long it'll be for. Thanks for everything over the years, guys, I've really appreciated the opportunity to get close to and be friends with the talented, genuine people here who I have the pleasure to call my friends.

I'm sure our paths will cross again in the future.

 

@Nebulon Ranger - I could've sworn I added you as a friend on Facebook at one point, but I assume it must not have gone through because when I looked again it prompted me to add you again... at the time I thought you just didn't want me as a friend on Facebook LOL.

lmao @Shadow
??
read up you silly fuck
:thinking:

@Keileon - Thanks. I'm sure our paths will cross again~

 

All things considered, this is me formally and clearly saying it: I will not be coming back to ZEJ as a community.

I've skirted the issue because I didn't want to lose the individual friendships I had forged in my years here over me leaving the community. I thought that saying surefire that I wasn't going to come back would lose me the friendship and the respect of those who remained. I thought that it would've made the reaction to my leaving more severe. And I wasn't prepared for that. It was childish, it was cowardly.

I owe the community-at-large an apology. Miz's post (as well as things I've heard after leaving) makes it clear that I didn't give an explanation to the people who weren't on staff as to why I was taking my hiatus to begin with. I left you guys in the dark, and I apologize because it was unfair of me to expect that my frustrations would be accurately understood by the rest of the community when I didn't make an effort to convey them. It was requested of me on the night that I left that I open up myself to the rest of the community, and I declined because I thought that my main grievances only needed to be conveyed to the staff. More than that, it was an emotional discussion for me and I was drained by the end of it -- more than I ever thought I would be by leaving an internet community. I didn't want to go through that again.

At this point I'm not sure if my reasons need to be publicly disseminated. I don't really want them deconstructed and reconstructed into something they are not. Ultimately, the community just isn't for me anymore. I don't think that I can come back to it from where I am.

I'm sad that this means I'll never get to play in another roleplay with this group, never get to develop the Manaverse, never get to bitch about the wiki again... hell, I'm just sad that I don't have a community to exist in and engage with anymore. I like ZEJ, and it'll always be a huge part of my life. I'm proud of the things we got to create together.

I'm sorry to you guys. I did let you down. At the time, I wanted to bounce back, and although I wasn't wholeheartedly set on returning, I know that I made an implicit promise, or strongly implied that I would be coming back. And I'm sorry to let you down there, too.

I wish you guys all the best, and my (Discord, Twitter, Facebook, <insert>) PMs are always open if you guys want to reach me.